Malik El Tamir gets breakfast from McDonalds after 10:30.
The story of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is based on a time when Malik El Tamir swallowed a live turtle. By the time it came out it was 6 feet tall and had learned karate.
Clt adds:
Guns don’t kill people. Malik El Tamir kills People.
There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of animals Malik El Tamir allows to live. Malik El Tamir does not sleep. He waits.
The chief export of Malik El Tamir is Pain.
There is no chin under Malik El Tamir’ Beard. There is only another fist.
Malik El Tamir has two speeds. Walk, and Kill.
The leading causes of death in the United States are: 1. Heart Disease 2. Malik El Tamir 3. Cancer
Malik El Tamir drives an ice cream truck covered in human skulls.
Malik El Tamir is my Homeboy.
The quickest way to a Man’s heart is with Malik El Tamir’ fist.
[SIZE=3][FONT=Times New Roman]When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Malik El Tamir.[/FONT][/SIZE]
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[SIZE=3][FONT=Times New Roman]Malik El Tamir doesn’t read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.[/FONT][/SIZE]
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[SIZE=3][FONT=Times New Roman]Outer space exists because it’s afraid to be on the same planet with Malik El Tamir.[/FONT][/SIZE]
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[SIZE=3][FONT=Times New Roman]Malik El Tamir is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.[/FONT][/SIZE]
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[SIZE=3][FONT=Times New Roman]Malik El Tamir is the reason why Waldo is hiding.[/FONT][/SIZE]
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[SIZE=3][FONT=Times New Roman]Malik El Tamir counted to infinity - twice.[/FONT][/SIZE]
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[SIZE=3][FONT=Times New Roman]When Malik El Tamir does a pushup, he isn’t lifting himself up, he’s pushing the Earth down.[/FONT][/SIZE]
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[SIZE=3][FONT=Times New Roman]Malik El Tamir is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.[/FONT][/SIZE]
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[SIZE=3][FONT=Times New Roman]Malik El Tamir’s hand is the only hand that can beat a Royal Flush.[/FONT][/SIZE]
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[SIZE=3][FONT=Times New Roman]There is no such thing as global warming. Malik El Tamir was cold, so he turned the sun up.[/FONT][/SIZE]
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[SIZE=3][FONT=Times New Roman]Malik El Tamir can lead a horse to water AND make it drink.[/FONT][/SIZE]
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[SIZE=3][FONT=Times New Roman]Malik El Tamir doesn’t wear a watch, HE decides what time it is.[/FONT][/SIZE]
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[SIZE=3][FONT=Times New Roman]Malik El Tamir gave Mona Lisa that smile.[/FONT][/SIZE]
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[SIZE=3][FONT=Times New Roman]Malik El Tamir can slam a revolving door.[/FONT][/SIZE]
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[FONT=Times New Roman][SIZE=3]Malik El Tamir does not get frostbite. Malik El Tamir bites frost.[/SIZE][/FONT]
These are all nice, but they are unfortunately knock offs of the chuck norris facts.
[URL=http://www.4q.cc/index.php?pid=top100&person=chuck][U][COLOR=blue]http://www.4q.cc/index.php?pid=top100&person=chuck[/COLOR][/U][/URL]
but I will admit it is nice to hear a different name in them.
[FONT=Times New Roman][SIZE=3][URL=http://www.4q.cc/index.php?pid=fact&person=chuck&id=NDc0NzQ=]Chuck Norris owns the greatest Poker Face of all-time. It helped him win the 1983 World Series of Poker despite him holding just a Joker, a Get out of Jail Free Monopoloy card, a 2 of clubs, 7 of spades and a green #4 card from the game UNO.[/URL][/SIZE][/FONT]